Tuesdays With Maggie

I've often thought it would be neat to write a book about Maggie and her effect on my life, but the market's flooded. However, I recently figured out how to give it a new spin: I'll begin each chapter with a haiku about Maggie. 

Like Maggie (and Purrcy because I couldn't resist throwing in this one), you're probably wondering how on Earth I came up with such an idea. It all started because the Family Video Jeff and I pass by on the way home started listing exactly three movie titles on their sign, and they were listed in such a way that each week it was as if there was a new poem on the sign. Things really started to spiral when they posted this:

Get Hard

Maggie

The Warrior

If you know either of us, this title caught our attention for two reasons. The obvious: we have a cat name Maggie. And we're both immature at times which I believe is good because we have stressful jobs. Our sense of humor helps keep us alive. So we ran with it, reciting the "poem" in different ways to create different meanings. The notion of Maggie as a kick ass warrior... amazing!

Eventually the sign changed (twas a sad day), and we were less interested until I decided that Family Video should start making haikus out of movie titles. Somehow this led to Jeff making haikus out of Star Wars titles, and that somehow led to haikus about Maggie. It may sound strange, but she's totally a haiku worthy cat. I've got two so far, but I feel like with time and some solid theme development, I could come up with enough to give my future "cat teaches her human lessons about life" memoir a decent twist and edge in the market. I'm still working on a title, but for now, here are some lovely, wisdom-filled Maggie haikus.

Maggie has cancer

She's living life to the max

Cause that's how she rolls

Maggie is so dope

Cancer or not, she's chilling

Like it's a Tuesday

Maggie, The Doctor
Are chilling in the TARDIS
Prepping for stardust

I know the last one had no real wisdom, but I couldn't resist. See you next week!

Geronimo!

Allons-y!

The TARDIS arrived! Granted it is missing a light and a more permanent details, but for now this is perfect. 

Besides, the kitties don't care. Maggie's even mocking me, "Neener, neener! The Doctor picked me to be his companion! Not you, mom!"

"Purrcy can you believe it? I thought The TARDIS was just on some silly show mom watched... but it's really here!" 

I know Maggie and Purrcy actually have no clue why there's a giant blue box in the living room, but they don't seem to care-- it is a box after all. Maggie is content to just chill inside.

Purrcy on the other hand... well, he's gone nuts. Especially after I hung up a toy. 

I'm so thankful my step-dad was able to make my dream come true for Maggie (and that Purrcy is benefiting too). Not every cat can say they've been inside a TARDIS! I'm also thankful he's willing to help me update it and make changes. I have a feeling it's going to get lots of love for a long time... so she'll need to be fixed up every once in while. But for now, she'll do just fine. 

"Get your own TARDIS, mom."

CSA Week 4

Thankfully we are done moving. Sadly, not all the boxes are unpacked. Our precious Purrcy hasn't been taking it too well. Despite Maggie's anxiety (and a temporary higher dose of medicine per the vet's orders), she is handling it quite well-- as long as we are all together with her stuff, she knows everything will eventually go back to normal. And she sleeps like a baby...

Purrcy on the other hand doesn't know what to make of the new place. He seems to like it just as much as Maggie but is still slightly unnerved-- to the point of an upset tummy. We've got some sort of cat antacid (sadly this is not our first experience with such medications because of Maggie's anxiety) that will soothe his belly. I just wish I could clearly communicate to him that everything will be exactly as it was before, just with new surroundings. For now, I will just keep looking at cute snap shots of him enjoying the windows, cuddling with Maggie, and taking more pictures of Purrcy when he does things like this...

Enough about the kitties (but if you ever need advice about cats with anxiety, let me know since we've tried just about everything-- did you know they make aromatherapy for cats?). This is supposed to be a post about food. What can I say? I love my feline children.

Week 4's CSA box was very green.

We received collards, some sort of lettuce, a red lettuce mix, broccoli, green onions, garlic scapes, and a few cucumbers. If I ever get my dream garden, it will have garlic-- so many parts of the plant can be used during the growing process!

These boxes are sort of like a choose your own adventure book except it's food. I chose to start my adventure with the garlic scapes. I found several recipes to try, but I settled on a garlic scape carbonara first. I was cooking for myself since Jeff was at work so it seemed the most appropriate. Plus, the last time I tried using the grill things did not go so well. Pasta on the stove top it was! I did hate that I had to cut the scapes up though. 

Their natural curves show off nature's beauty... I almost went digging for my good camera, but alas, I was hungry. The original recipe called for bacon, but I didn't have it on hand since we lean towards a plant based diet. To amp up the scapes, I seasoned them with a bit of poultry seasoning as they cooked in the pan. I also added some of the red Siberian kale we had left from last week's box. Overall, I enjoyed the dish. Jeff is more of a kale eater than I am so if I make this again, I hope to add spinach instead. I also think some fakin' bacon would be a nice addition too.

Over the weekend we had plenty of unpacking left to do which meant serious desires to eat out. However, we love going to the Farmer's Market (minus its early start time), especially now that we live closer. We bought yellow potatoes, zucchini, blueberries, and a few more strawberries before they go out of season here.

We ended up making a compromise, or rather, my cravings and wallet made one. We ate an early dinner at a favorite Mexican joint of mine and had a small salad for a late dinner/snack.

We have oodles of lettuce, but it's not all that appealing on its own, at least to me. So I thought we could grill the garlic scapes and zucchini for a bit more flavor. I was a bit leery about the scapes. I knew the zucchini would be great as we'd done it before following a Pioneer Woman recipe. However, the idea of eating something straight from a garlic plant seems a bit absurd-- I love the flavor of garlic, but make a funny face if I accidentally bite into a bit of a cooked clove hiding in my pasta. But the Internet raves about garlic scapes, claiming they taste almost like a green bean with a bit of extra flavor. In this instance, I bow to the Internet. The grilled scapes actually tasted as described. If you manage to find scapes, I highly recommend grilling some up! The recipe we used (from With Food and Love) paired nicely with the zucchini, and the left over oil and lemon zest we had was a nice way to dress the rest of the salad. 

On Sunday we initially planned to make collard greens and a potato parsnip mash, but I had a hankering for my Grandma's Au Gratin potatoes. Purrcy appeared to agree with me, putting his paw on the recipe in our family cookbook. We stuck with the collards and paired them with the potatoes.

I was worried about the collards, but they were actually delicious! I have to thank my brother for pointing me in the right direction. He couldn't remember the exact recipe, but he knew it involved apple cider vinegar and maple syrup. After a quick Google search I found what looked like it could be a solid recipe from Heather Crosby. Because there's only two of us, and we only had 15 leaves, we needed to adjust the recipe. We also wanted to give it a little something extra since it was being paired with meat or a protein heavy main dish. Fake bacon to the rescue! We also threw in some green garlic and green onion from the week's previous CSA box.

Our adaptions worked out well, especially since it was just the two of us, and this turned out to be one of my favorite CSA experiments. If you need left overs, I'd consider doubling the recipe.

Ingredients:

1. 15 large collard leaves
2. 3 to 4 slices of fake bacon (or real bacon if not following a vegetarian diet)
3. 1 stalk of green garlic
4. 1 green onion
5. 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
6. 1/4 cup maple syrup (preferably Grade B)
7. 1/8 cup water
8. Pinch of salt

Directions:

1. Wash and rough chop the collards. Removing the stems is optional.
2. Cook the green garlic and green onion in a small pan until tender.
3. Put the collards in a large pot, and stir in all ingredients except the bacon.
4. Bring the mixture to a boil over medium to high heat.
5. Cook bacon following directions on the package, and once cooked, chop it up, and toss it into the collard mixture.
6. Reduce heat, letting it simmer until the liquid reduces completely. 
7. Eat! 

We still have items left in the box, most notably the romaine lettuce. Our plan is to grill it, and use it in place of taco shells. Other than that, we'll have a few more salads, and keep using the green garlic, the scapes, and green onion.

I wonder what we'll get in the next box!

We've Got a Musing and a Gem... and a Silly Kitty!

So I've been a bit busy lately. Between work, weird work occurrences, physical therapy for my hip bursitis, and just typical life busyness (this word looks weird), I feel like one of those poor beheaded chickens. It doesn't help that the weather has been rather wonky... tornado warnings in February! And I have to say, it's super weird and kind of scary not having cable during a storm (we canceled a while back because it's pricy, and we have yet to get the stuff to make the local stations work). I miss turning up the volume to extra loud so I can hear Jim and Nick (the weather dudes, obviously) while I hide away in the bathroom with the kitties. Thankfully, I'm safe as are Maggie and Purrcy and the husband.

Unless Purrcy decides to get more daring. Although, I'm not sure how much further he can take it, considering he's sprained his paw in a toaster, tried to put his healed paw in the hot toaster, got stuck behind the refrigerator because I guess he thought jumping behind it was a good idea even though we weren't home, and he had no escape plan, fallen from the top of our refrigerator into a pile of glass shards created from his fall, and whatever else he does while we're sleeping. But I digress.

Despite a jam-packed schedule, I managed to do some baking. Since I'd had such a terrible run of bad luck with new recipes, I tried out a Martha Stewart recipe because Martha has never steered me in the wrong direction.

I went with her Chunky Peanut, Chocolate, and Cinnamon cookies... but I omitted the peanuts. Still delicious! So how to make these bad boys and girls?

Ingredients:

•  2 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 teaspoon salt 
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 3/4 cup unsalted butter (I used vegan butter because I'm lactose intolerant)
• 1/2 cup smooth peanut butter
• 1 cup packed brown sugar
• 1/2 sugar 
• 2 large eggs (Use an egg replacer to make it vegan if you want because my chocolate chips are vegan so I assume it would work out just dandy!) 
• 2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
• 1 1/2 cups chocolate chips 

Directions:

1. Preheat the oven to about 350. I say about because you all know I have a shitty oven. 
2. "Whisk" together the flour, baking soda, salt, and cinnamon. That's right. I whisked it... with a fork. I'm not Martha!
3. Cream the butter and peanut butter together. Martha says to do it for two minutes. I just guessed. 
4. Cream in the sugars. Again, Martha says to mix it for two minutes. I guessed! 
5. Mix in the eggs and the vanilla (Note: Martha says to add the vanilla at the end with the chocolate chip cookies. That seemed strange to me becuase no other recipe has you do that, at least that I know of. So I added the vanilla at the "normal" time.).
6. Gradually add in your flour mixture that you so gracefully whisked together. 
7. Once combined, fold in your chocolate chips. 
8. Refrigerate the dough for about fifteen minutes or until it's kind "firm."
9. Scoop dough on to parchment paper lined baking sheets (seriously, screw oiling the pan anymore). 
10. Bake for 10 to 13 minutes (I baked mine for 11 minutes, but I like a chewy cookie.).
11. Enjoy! * 

 * I forgot to take a better picture of the cookies, and I'm too focused on eating them to take another picture.

Hello, Goodbye

I never realized how much Sloane meant to me until today. I knew her health was failing, but I didn't expect her death to hit me so hard. I mean, she hissed at me every time I came home. She once peed on the floor in protest to Maggie's presence (BTW Sloane was a cat in case you didn't realize you were on a crazy cat lady's blog.). Maggie was only there for a few days, but the those few days made Sloane hate me forever. Not really. I think she was a fiercely loyal cat who didn't want anyone infringing on her territory or her ownership of my mom. People might have thought Sloane was grumpy or mean, but I think she just loved her people. They were her people and her people only. So in a way, she kind of peed on the floor out of love. It's weird, but then again, we're talking about cats, specifically cats I picked out... and we know how much luck I have in that department.

I think that's why losing Sloane is so fucking hard. I picked her. I picked her after months of begging my parents for a new cat. For some reason I thought it was a good idea to get a new cat RIGHT AFTER Marley (Marley is my most famous dead cat-- just ask my best friend. Before we were best friends I thought it was a good idea to tell him about how awesome my dead cat was... I might have been intoxicated, very legally intoxicated. And somehow we still managed to become best friends!) died. That didn't happen which is probably for the best. I did manage to convince them to let me get a cat about three or four months later... and the next day they took me to college.

So Sloane never was my cat, but she was kind of like a sister. A sister that got annoyed when I came home for the weekend. But she was my cat sister. She met my first boyfriend (the one I count as first because technically he's the second). She kept me company when I was home for the summer. She always "said hi" whenever I called my mom. She was at my college graduation party... basically she's existed and been around for most of the important milestones I've been cognizant of so in some way she's associated with those memories.

At least I've still got Maggie. But holy balls when she's gone. I cried on the way to class today, stumbled over words because I accidentally thought of Sloane, and almost canceled my office hours but didn't because leaving my office made her death more real. I'm going to need a week off and lots of tissue when Maggie leaves. See? I can't even say Maggie and the d-word in the same sentence.

I'll love you forever, Sloane! Go find Grandma Darling. She's got your back!

To end on a lighter note, I introduce you to Purrcy, "in the flesh!"

Our League Photo...

I'm in a fantasy football league. They won't let me upload my own picture unless it comes from a website. Suck it, ESPN.

Having Cats Is Kind of Like Having Kids...

Cats require far less maintenance than human children, but they certainly seem to have similar qualities. For instance, Maggie may not want anything to do with me, but as soon as I get on the phone, she's bounding toward me trying to "talk" to whoever (usually my mom) is on the other end of the phone. Now that we have two cats, the similarities are even more striking. Sharing is a HUGE deal. Maggie doesn't like sharing. Although I think she's made a secret deal with Purrcy-- "I'll let you live in my house if you let me eat your food. Don't worry. You can have my food." Why on Earth she wants to eat his less expensive kitten food... the mysteries of cat children. Despite their sharing issues, I'm glad to say our house is a happier one since the last time I posted about our new addition.

Maggie seems to be warming up to Purrcy... slowly. At least it's something. I think things would be a lot easier if they would actually "listen" to each other. Purrcy is only seven months old, and he's used to being around other kittens and cats. All he wants to do is play with Maggie. He follows her around like she's a rock star (she kind of is!). Maggie doesn't see it like that though. She's like the teenage version of my brother who got super annoyed because all I wanted to do was hang out with him (P.S. My brother was and is amazing. He did hang out with me a lot, but I could be a rather annoying little sister, especially when he was trying to hang out with his friends). Of course, I never understood why he didn't want to hang out or play games with me. Purrcy is like that younger version of myself. His Maggie-butt-sniffing is essentially equivalent to me following my brother around asking non-stop questions. And Maggie's hissing is my brother doing whatever he did to get me to leave him alone (I don't remember what he did to get me to stop pestering him... hmmm.).

I think my ability to compare situations is a sign of hope. Someday soon Maggie will finally realize Purrcy is following her not because he's annoying but because he thinks she's the bees knees. And someday Purrcy will realize he just needs to give Maggie a little space. Either way, I love these two furballs. Maggie will always be my gal (even if she only begrudgingly takes part in photo shoots)!

And Purrcy is keeping me young and on my toes.  He even has a hint of mischievousness in that cute little napping smile! "I'm totally going to chew on her new Sperry's!*"

Lord help me when I actually start popping out human babies! For now, these two will do!

*I originally typed new shoes, but just as I was finishing up this post, he actually started chewing on my brand new Sperry's. A string is a string with this kid. 

You Know How They Say You Always Turn Into Your Mother...

Well, it's true. Even for cats. At least in this household. As you know, Maggie suffers from anxiety. Instead of crying or going into freak out mode, she over-grooms. Thank God that's all she does. She could be shitting everywhere. I love Maggie, baldness and all, but her anxiety is not taken lightly in this household. Even though her chosen outlet does not disturb Jeff or me, we know anxiety is real, even for cats. It probably helps that we know people with anxiety and another well-loved family cat with behavioral issues. Just like with humans, anxiety can manifest physically. We don't want this to happen to Maggie for two reasons: A. More health issues means more money spent at the vet's office. B. Those physical problems can shorten her life span, and I would prefer she live forever.  I'm serious. I know she can't live forever, but she better be here for a really long time! I mean look at this face! How could you not want her forever?!

So, on our quest to ease Maggie's anxiety, we've tried pretty much everything: medicine, pheromone diffusers, prescription food, toys, placing multiple food bowls around the house to coax out her hunting instincts and provide stimulation... heck, she even has a leash for trips outside! I've also rubbed homeopathic oils on her fur (yes, it is safe). It all works to a point. Her belly is still bald, and she's started pulling from her legs. So, a few days ago we adopted another cat. At first it might sound counter-intuitive. But it's not, or at least it's not supposed to be anyway. The new kitten is supposed to give Maggie something to do while Jeff and I are off at work.

We chose a young male kitten. His name is Purrcy.

Now, there is no definitive answer as to whether it will help Maggie (this is according to the Internet and of course, our vet). But our hope is her mothering instincts will kick in, and she will show the little guy the ropes as well as have someone to keep her company during the day and therefore not pull out her own hair.

So far, it's gone as you might expect. Purrcy wants to play with Maggie, but she is not having it. She's swatted at him a few times, hissed, growled. And then there was my breakdown this morning. Through my tears all I could really say was, "Maggie hates me. I miss my Maggie." Or it was something like that. Don't get me wrong. Purrcy is one cool dude. Plus, I would save every stray cat if I could. If I was rich, I would totally build a shelter with space to play, and there would be plenty of windows for the cats to enjoy nature from afar. But Maggie is my gal. She's my napping buddy. She's my grad school pal. I may have deleted what she typed, but she nonetheless always tried to help me with my papers. She's this gal's best friend!

They (mostly cat people and the Internet) say it will all work out in time. For now, Purrcy is chillaxing in the other room with all of Maggie's old toys (She's too cool for them now. I mean she is an adult now.) until he it's time for his next "recess" with Maggie. Here's hoping it works out!

Stay tuned for updates. Maybe next time I'll have a photo of them together! *fingers crossed*