Sunday, July 14, 2013

Wisconsin Part 2... AKA Beer!

Clearly I'm behind on this blog thing, espeially considering I left you hanging last time with promises of a goat and oodles of beer. I really am sorry, but I've been busy grading papers, doing other teacher stuff, trying to find a non-sexist wedding card, getting a bitchin' tattoo (yes, this is very important business, especially when it's a silhouette of your cat), and hoping my car doesn't explode. Seriously. I thought it might explode. It's been in the shop for a week with a bad spark plug... explosion totally possible in my book.

In all honesty, I should still be grading papers right now, but I assigned myself this blog post before I assigned the work that I need to grade. Blog post wins. Plus, I have until Tuesday to finish the grading. Another win for this blog post. Okay. Moving on to the promised beer and goat.

As you know, that is if you read Wisconsin Part 1, Jeff and I took a trip to Wisconsin. I told Jeff I wanted to go hiking, and he said, "Okay, but when do we get to do any 'Jeff' stuff on this trip?" There was a long pause while I stared at him. I'm sure you can imagine what that stare might have looked like. And then Jeff said, "Oh yeah. We're going to the brewery. This trip is basically made for me. Oops." Oh, Jeff, how I love thee.

Now, I'm no beer aficionado like Jeff, but I do know that The New Glarus Brewing Company is amazing. And I'm totally the one who introduced it to Jeff. That's right. I'm awesome.

This is what started it all. I have no idea about the specifics of this machine, but I do know going from that...

... to having this giant red building, large enough to house multiple pilot machines, as your waste management building at your brewery means you've come pretty far. By the way, I forgot that's what the building was when I took the picture. I was all, "What's this pretty building?" Snap. Snap. "Oh. Yeaaaaah. It's their waste management building. Oh well. It's still pretty."

Of course, we did not leave the brewery without a tasting. The ever-famous Spotted Cow, Moon Man, Black Top, Totally Naked, and Two Women were available for tasting. A limited addition, Serendipity, was also available for tasting in a pint. We decided just to go for a beer flight each (is that what it's always called? Or does it depend on how many you try?).

I tried Moon Man, a No-Coast Pale Ale. It was incredibly hoppy. I hated it, mostly because I hate pale ales. I chose it for the name. It just goes to show you how much I love beer! Jeff on the other hand, went with a Black Top, a black IPA. Jeff says it was pretty good. I swear. I just asked him, and he shot me a look and said, "Really? Just say it was pretty good." He's going to be so mad when he reads this. I love you, Jeff!

Jeff cheated. He took a fucking sip before I could take my fucking picture. I don't actually care. It just bugs me because the levels don't match. But I digress.  I chose Two Women, again because I liked the name. Smash the patriarchy with beer! Turns out, it too is gross in my opinion. So Jeff and I switched. He originally had Totally Naked. He thought it was too light. But that my friends, is right up my alley-- if it's not a wheat ale, I like it light!

We both chose Spotted Cow for our last taste. It's a classic. Also, Jeff is super cute. He looks like a professional beer taster.

And we also bought beer to bring back home. This is everything, excluding the spare bottles of Spotted Cow and Dancing Man Wheat. So what have we got?

First there is the Edel-Pils. They call it a Bohemian Pilsner. The only pilsners I "like" taste like water. Good luck, Jeff. Next, there's Spotted Cow. It's a farmhouse ale, and it's delicious. Third in line is the Dancing Man Wheat. I requested the second bottle, and I'm glad I did. We just tried it today. New Glarus says, "If you dream of wheat this brew will get your toes tapping... Lick the foam from your mouth and admit sometimes you just gotta get up and dance." I kind of wanted to do a jig after drinking it. I almost like it more than Spotted Cow... I feel terrible for saying that. Anywho.

Jeff digs Two Women, the beer. The feminist in me wants to love it. It's called Two Women for a reason. New Glarus says, "Four thousand years before Christ, Sumerian women created the divine drink of beer. Viking women brewed in Norse society. European Ale Wives were so successful as cottage brewers they were taxed. Artisanal women lost their domination of the daily ritual of brewing during the Industrial Revolution. Today’s brewing trade is controlled by men." BUT. Two craft companies led by women, New Glarus Brewing and Weyermann Malting, combined their powers to create Two Women. Sadly my taste buds do not like it. I support it though!

What's next? I still haven't figured out what's going on with the red caps... oh, they're a part of their Thumbprint series. Basically, the brew-master gets jiggy (or is it giggy?) with it, and creates whatever he wants, and then it's usually never made again. This one is a Berliner Weiss. Jeff was so kind, picking beers I might actually like. The brew-master also made a beer to celebrate the brewery's anniversary: The Anniversary Strong Ale. I won't be partaking in that one.

And finally, the one I am most excited about, Serendipity. Usually New Glarus puts out a Cherry Tart of some sort. However, the cherry season did not go very well. So the brew-master worked his magic, and he used the cherries he was able to find, cranberries, and apples to make Serendipity. If it's anything like The Raspberry or Cherry Tart, I'm sure it will be simply amazing.

Okay. That was more typing than I expected. I didn't even get into as much detail about the beer like I planned to do. So much for this being a two post trip. I promised a goat though.

This is why I wanted to go to Wisconsin. I wanted to mini-golf with goats. But it rained. I was so fucking pissed. But by golly, I got a photo of a goat. Jeff didn't think it was real. He was wrong. It moved... a lot. Plus, I said goodbye to the goat because that's the kind of gal I am, and you know what the goat did? He said, "Baaah!" I shit you not. The goat responded to my farewell. Someday I will mini-golf with this goat and many other goats. And Jeff of course.

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